There is a magic that happens when men come together with intention.
Last weekend, I was privileged to speak at an event for men. I delivered a keynote titled: Leadership from the Inside Out: The Power of Emotional Connection in Peak Performance.
There were a number of speakers and organizations there supporting men. While we weren’t formally given a theme for the day, the messages all had a clear and common thread.
Emotional Connection with self, others, and community is at the heart of leadership, performance and well-being.
Human-centred, heart-centred leadership is the way of the future.
To break the harmful tropes of what it means to be a man, we need to create spaces for men to gather and explore new paths. We are so much more than just the producers, providers, and protectors, and it is time we allowed ourselves to go deeper together.
You don’t have to look very deep into statistics to see that the norms of the past are not working.
Mental Health
- Suicide Rates: Men are significantly more likely to die by suicide than women. In the United States, men die by suicide at a rate nearly 4 times that of women. In many Western countries, suicide is one of the leading causes of death among young men.
- Depression and Anxiety: Men often underreport symptoms of depression and anxiety due to societal expectations to appear strong and unemotional. This can lead to underdiagnosis and undertreatment of mental health issues among men.
Violence and Crime
- Aggression and Violence: Traditional masculine norms that emphasize aggression and dominance can contribute to higher rates of violent behavior. For example, men commit the vast majority of homicides worldwide, and men predominantly perpetrate domestic violence incidents.
- Incarceration Rates: Men represent the vast majority of the prison population in most countries. Men comprise about 93% of the federal prison population in the United States.
Health and Longevity
- Life Expectancy: Men have a shorter life expectancy than women. In many countries, men live 5-7 years less than women on average, partly due to higher rates of risky behaviors and lower rates of seeking medical help.
- Health-Seeking Behavior: Men are less likely to visit doctors for regular check-ups and are more likely to ignore symptoms of illness, often due to the stigma around appearing weak or vulnerable.
Social and Emotional Well-being
- Emotional Expression: Societal expectations for men to suppress emotions can lead to poorer emotional and relational health. Men are often discouraged from expressing vulnerability, which can hinder intimate relationships and social connections.
- Loneliness: Studies have shown that men are more likely to experience loneliness and have fewer close friends compared to women. This can be attributed to societal pressures on men to be self-reliant and stoic.
Education and Employment
- Educational Attainment: In many developed countries, women now surpass men in educational attainment. Men are less likely to graduate from high school and are underrepresented in higher education institutions.
- Job Satisfaction and Employment: Traditional expectations to be the primary breadwinner can lead to significant stress and dissatisfaction among men. Additionally, the decline of traditionally male-dominated industries (e.g., manufacturing) has disproportionately affected men’s employment rates and economic stability.
Gender Roles and Relationships
- Parental Leave: Men are less likely to take parental leave or participate in caregiving roles, which can affect family dynamics and perpetuate traditional gender roles. This reluctance is often due to societal norms that view caregiving as primarily a female responsibility.
- Domestic Responsibilities: Despite changing norms, men often do less domestic work and childcare compared to women, which can create imbalances and stress within households.
These statistics and findings illustrate that traditional masculine norms and expectations can have detrimental effects on men’s mental and physical health, relationships, and overall well-being. Shifting away from these outdated tropes toward more inclusive and flexible understandings of masculinity can benefit individuals and society.
My mission is to empower a community of emotionally connected leaders who drive a more connected society so that we can tackle some of these issues at the source. Let’s address these before they are issues rather than so many of the band-aid solutions we are left with today.